When you don't have all the answers, perhaps it's a sign to just stop thinking.
By Amy Crawford
Today I pen this note from Coles Bay on the incredibly picturesque East Coast of Tasmania, where I'm ever so fortunate to spend my family Christmas holidays. This photo was taken on one of my morning walks; it's a hill I love to hike of a morning in the knowledge that it'll just be me, a chorus of kookaburras (or 'riot' depending who you ask) and Wilson (my 4 legged friend). Coles Bay holidays bring plenty of time and space to think and as I sat atop this hill - pondering, questioning, wondering - it occurred to me that maybe the answer was to stop thinking altogether. Let me explain.
If you asked me a multitude of questions right now, in reference perhaps to the next 12 months and beyond, there's every chance I'd reply with the same answer: "I don't know". Because the truth of the matter is, I simply don't. Usually I do, lately however, I don't.
I don't know what next year has in store for me. I don't know if I'll be living in the same lovely neighbourhood or if I'll finally pick up and move to the sea. I don't know if I'll start a new project and if I did what it might look like. I don't know if I'll change tact at work, study more or travel to places I've never seen. I don't know if I'll be a better friend/daughter/human (although I sure hope I will be). I don't know if I'll finally learn to say no to the third square of dark chocolate (or if it even matters) or the occasional 2nd coffee that tips me over the 'edge'. I don't know if I'll keep growing my hair or crop it all off. I don't know if I'll be a better money saver, though what I do know is that I'll continue to spend less.
You see? I don't know much.
As 2015 comes to a close I've felt this ever brewing pressure to need to decide, about all of this; to have a plan of attack, a specific direction in all that I do.
Every which way I turn there's talk of resolutions and new beginnings; folks discussing weight loss and exercise plans, monthly and quarterly work goals. There's industry colleagues launching inspiring New Year programs and initiatives, sharing tips for resolutions and things to let go of in the exciting New Year.
Yet today I had my own revelation..
I decided to draw a line in my thinking, and to simply start trusting.
You see, I've done this very successfully before but just lately I guess, I've slipped. A little over three years ago I had absolutely no idea what I was going to do with my life. I was very unwell (and was subsequently living with my parents). Eighteen years of recruitment experience was all I knew. Reclaiming my health and my independence, I returned to Melbourne with an amazing sense that everything would work out, that as long as I put one foot in front of another in a direction that felt right, I would be ok. And I was. Within 3 short months, The Holistic Ingredient was formed, my new life unfolding before my eyes.
There was no business plan, there wasn't a goal in site. All there was was faith.
Often when we instill pressure to have to do, to learn, to reinvent, to evolve, to uphold expectations, we can infact simply build resistance. Our loss of faith and inability to trust prohibits the natural flow of life. Our fear builds walls around us; we become blind to subliminal messages in our environments, in the people that we meet and the experiences we share. You see, it is indeed true that what we think, say or feel becomes our reality and I see this every day in my CTC therapy practise; clients desperate to know how it'll all work out, terrified of living with regret, of never finding their greatness.
So, as the year comes to a close I'm going to practise what I preach and do what I've done before. My commitment is simply this; to let go of the need to know, to enjoy every moment in each passing day and to let my world unfold around me, exactly as it should. I'm going to embrace the uncertainty and the anticipation that this brings in the knowledge that it is ok when sometimes, you really just don't know.
But right now? I'm going fishing..
So tell me, what does this bring up for you? What if you too quit wondering, pondering, thinking? How does the idea of simply trusting and having faith make you feel?